My Labor Day Girls

I just had a sudden realization that my baby, Tabitha, is 11 month today AND she will be starting foods in one month! She is still thriving exclusively on breastmilk and a very happy baby. I am so excited to see that she is a red-head girl. So, now I've got a Blonde Hollywood Drama Girl (Naomi) and the Red Temper Girl (Tabi).

Wow, time flies so fast!

Naomi will be 2 years & 11 months on the fourth. She will be turning 3 in one month. Yep, both my girls were born on the first week of September. God really has a sense of humor. Both girls were born on Labor Day exactly two years apart. I'm not kidding :o) For those who might be wondering... we did not plan our family, we believe that is God's business. I love how God gave us two beautiful girls with wonderful birth stories.

You know, I am daily reminded that God gave me noisy girls for a reason... so I can hear them! LOL! If the house is quiet... too quiet, than I know I need to check on them. TWICE I found Naomi in my parents' room, drawing on herself with whiteboard markers! Once I found Tabi chewing on a bug. Yeah, life in our house can be quite entertaining, kinda crazy, sometimes overwhelming and lots of fun. I love the stories we are reaping from our girls... the day will come that we will come together as a family, laugh about the embarrassing things, share amusing stories and enjoy the rich memories that churn around in our thoughts, hearts & emotions. Especially memories like these:

Naomi Shalom

My favorite Naomi picture:

Tabitha Charis-Helle

My favorite Tabi Picture:

Being a deaf mama isn't always easy. I have days where I find myself wondering why I have to deal with the struggles of being deaf, but I have to remind myself of the blessings too. I am bless to be deaf because I can sleep in total silent at night, but I struggle because I want to be able to understand Spanish. Lip-reading Spanish is very difficult because it's all tongue and the lips barely moves. Even my deaf Costa Rican friend, Alexandra, who is just like me... struggles at times with lip-reading because of the "lazy lips" (that's what she calls them! LOL!) that spanish-speakers tend to have.

BUT God has many reasons for allowing me to go through these struggles. It is building my character, helping me mature, teaching me to be patience with myself & others, allowing me to grow in grace and many other things. I'm human... God never said life would be easy, He just promised it would be worth it. Looking at my hubby, my girls and my family... I can say my life is worth living it, deaf and all.

And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me—everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you.

Philippians 4:8-9

Remember, God never said life would be easy. He just promised it would be worth it.

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Naomi: What's That Noise? / My Life As Being Deaf

This is been Naomi’s question for the last month and still is today. Its pretty funny having my two year old ask me, “Mommy, what’s that noise?” I really wish I could describe HOW she says that question, so cute! Well, how is a deaf mama supposed to answer that one!! I’ve been waiting and expecting the typical “why” questions that most two and three year olds start asking, but instead I am trying to find clever ways to answer the “noise” question. “It’s the washing machine, I think” “That was a car, I think” “The floor is creaky, I think” “The fan is making that noise, I think” “That’s Lina barking, I think”. Getting the idea?

Yes, it is challenging being deaf. Life is very different for me. I have to have a personal secretary, which my wonderful hubby has volunteered to be. I can’t make typical phone calls so he does that for me when he has time (talk about a flexible job!). I do my best to do everything on email or text messaging, but most times it is easier for him to make the calls. Especially now that we live in a Spanish speaking country. I can read and write in Spanish, but not enough to get by on my own.

The hardest thing for me is being stuck between two worlds: The deaf world and the hearing world.

I am 100% deaf, but I can hear about 25-30% with my hearing aid. I can speak very well for a deaf person (which is not normal…a God-thing) and I am almost fluent in sign language.

Most of you are probably thinking, “What do you mean ‘almost’ fluent?”

Well, speaking English is my first language. Sign language is my second. Why? Because, as a child, I was put in a special speech therapy program where they wanted to see how successful it would be to help me speak instead of sign. So, that put me on a strict rule of “no sign language” allowed. Well, I did better than they expected me to do. It is a miracle that I can speak as well as I do. I am thankful for that gift from the Lord. Later I learned sign language on and off through out my young years. I never really embraced it till my hubby (Jon) and I became missionaries at Rancho Sordo Mudo. That is where I felt most comfortable (first time in my life) with my deafness/hearing impairment. That is also where my ability to sign blossomed. I am forever grateful to God for the two years we were there. He brought me to a place where I was able to “accept” my deafness. I am also grateful for all the kids who impacted me and helped me and showed me the beauty of being deaf. God was so good to put Jon and me there for that short time to show me that there is nothing wrong with being deaf.

2005 / Me and The Girls @ Rancho Sordo Mudo

So, I am labeled “hearing impaired” by the deaf world. I am not “deaf enough” to be completely in the deaf world (because I can speak good, hear, etc.). I am labeled “deaf” by the hearing world. I am not “hearing enough” to be completely in the hearing world (because I have a hearing aid, speech impediment, etc.). So, I have one foot in the deaf world and one foot in the hearing world. It’s not easy doing that. Only those who are like me really understand. It is hard to explain the challenges because I can’t begin to describe what it is like to be deaf. After all, I’ve never heard like a hearing person in my life!! So, how is a deaf person supposed to describe the world he/she is in to a hearing person?

Here’s my best explanation.

It’s like reading a book. A hearing person generally can read (hear) every word and maybe misses one or two words out of a whole paragraph (conversation). A deaf person can’t read (hear) every word and WILL miss several words out of a whole paragraph (conversation). The words they miss…they have to make quick guesses in their minds on what words they missed and piece it together to fully understand a paragraph (a conversation).

To put it simply, it’s like playing Mad Libs. You have a paragraph with blanks scattered throughout. You have to fill in the blanks according to verbs, nouns, pronouns, etc…to pull together a “complete” paragraph. After you do that…what happens? You are either right on or totally off the wall silly. Now, imagine how easy it is for a deaf person to misunderstand the paragraph (conversation) because of the need to fill in the blanks where they missed words and pull together a quick summary of where the storyline is going. It doesn’t always make sense and it’s easy to feel dumb. Especially when the deaf person is expected to ask a question to keep the story going when they aren’t fully sure what the story is about to begin with.

Now, do you have a pretty good idea of what my daily life is like for me? It can be tiring reading lips (group conversations wear me out), putting it all together in my head and making sure I understood. Especially when I have a 2 1/2 year old already making full sentences and trying to carry on conversations with me. Whew! BUT I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me! God had many reasons for creating me to be deaf and one day I will know those reasons, can’t wait! :o)

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